Arnold "Friend"

While reading “Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been?” by Joyce Carol Oates, I couldn’t help but become strangely engrossed by the horrible situation in which Connie found herself. I was reading it-despite being advised otherwise-at night after my Mom was fast asleep, and halfway through the story, I couldn’t help but stand up and close the shutters in the room where I was studying and turn on all the lights I could. In addition, I found myself becoming overly sensitive to the usually drowned-out sounds of cars driving through the neighborhood. I found this story to be one in which any young girl, or woman of any age, can relate to. Although Joyce Carol Oates writes an exaggerated version, many women at a young age experience a situation in which they feel threatened or uncomfortable because of a male.

In “Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been?”, Arnold Friend becomes the stereotypical male predator that most females find themselves worrying about while at home alone. With his shaggy black hair that was “crazy as a wig”, and his eyes that were “chips of broken glass”, he becomes a greaser-esque character, with tight pants tucked into his boots, and a white shirt that was tight enough to show off his lean arms (618). And while meant to be a sickening and perverse character, I couldn’t help but be intrigued by Arnold Friend’s charisma. From the moment that he pulls up to Connie’s house, he holds her attention, and makes her second guess staying in the house. At one point Connie blushes because “the glasses [he was wearing] made it impossible for her to see just what this boy was looking at. She couldn’t decide if she liked him or if he was just a jerk, and so she dawdled in the doorway.” (617). For Connie to be considering going for a drive with Arnold, a murderer, says a lot about Arnold. It shows that not only is he persuasive, but he has a sort of charm that stems from his mysteriousness.

Another thing that struck me as strange was the way in which Connie deals with males. She seems to have this air of confidence, but I had a hard time deciphering whether or not this is true confidence, or just a face she puts up to cover her insecurities. Although beautiful, Connie is constantly checking her reflection in mirrors, “or checking other people’s faces to make sure her own was all right.” (614). This tells me that Connie is truly insecure, and is just trying to grow up too fast and let off a sense of false security to play games with men. It seems like this control that she seems to have over males is her way of getting the reaction she wants out of people, which she doesn’t get from her family. It is sad that her character comes to her own downfall because of her attitude and her values. If it weren’t for her self confidence, and the way she acted when Arnold Friend first saw her at the movies, maybe Connie wouldn’t have faced the same horrific ending that she did, at the feet of Arnold “Friend”. (534)